quotes I love

Don’t steal! The government hates competition
Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
I'm not suffering from insanity, I'm enjoying every minute of it
Eat healthy, exercise more, still die
Time is what keeps things from happening all at once
Smile, it makes people wonder what you're up too..
Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense
A good lawyer knows the law, a great lawyer knows the judge
Out of my mind. Back in 5 minutes
Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them
I'm not smiling at you, I'm trying not to laugh!
You may laugh because I'm different but I laugh because you're all the same
Love me or leave me. Hey! Where's everybody going??
Everyones entitled to be stupid but you are abusing the
priviledge
I'm gonna smile like nothing's wrong, talk like everything's perfect, act like it's just a dream, and pretend he's not hurting me.
A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic.
I was standing in the park wondering why frisbees got bigger as they got closer...then it hit me
Roses are red...violets are blue...who cares...So ArE cRaYoNs
You're unique, just like everyone else....
I told my psychiatrist that everyone hated me. He told me I was being ridiculous. Everyone hadn't met me yet
Im an angel! Honest! The horns are just there to keep the halo up straight!
Can I get your picture? I collect nature disasters
Just because you aren't paranoid doesn't mean they're not after you.
Earth first. We'll screw up the other planets later
The latest survey shows that three out of four people make up 75% of the population.
I must confess, I was born at a very early age
Don't walk in my footsteps. I walk into walls
He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
Jiggle it a little it'll give
Befor you insult someone, walk a mile in there shoes. That way when you insult them, you are a mile away, and you have your shoes